Starting Over At 30 With Nothing

As a youth, attaining the approximate age of 30 is generally perceived by many as a milestone but as an individual, is it?

Many struggle to wrap their thoughts around their prospects and chances of social, economic, and financial survival at 30.

You may have no friends, no family, no relationships, no job, and a blank clue of where to start – just a blurry, faded picture in your mind of who you really want to be.

Or you’ve lived the entire life trying to make everyone else happy, and now you’re sick and tired of giving all of that your energy away.

Eventually, all that will matter is waking up, getting ready to look the other way – change direction and live start to put your life in a plan. It will help you if this is done on your terms, pace, and resources available to you.

Starting over again is like sowing a new seed on a fertile land after previously doing so with either a bad seed or on an unfertile land.

Never a Bad Idea to Start Over

A young man is outside and is holding out a message on a pad that says, "start over."

If there’s ever a life that sails from graduating from college – landing a great job – getting married – traveling the world and living happily ever after, without an inch of challenges, it is a lie!

The truth and reality are that, at every age, life is everything but a straight line. Life can come at everyone, at any stage or age in their lives.

While some have it cool before 30 and struggle afterward, others may have experienced a tough living under 30 and live a good life afterward because they have adapted learnings from the past and decided to start over.

A friend of mine once said that the one big regret they apparently have is “they wished they were so lucky to have the courage to live a life that is true to them, not the life others expected of them.”

If eventually, you’re able to make it through the downtimes and settle the dust, then it’s time to start all over again. 

Starting over may not eventually be easy, but realizing it and consciously starting over may increase the chances of successfully designing the life you desire.

It is a natural phase of conducting a reset of one’s self to be able to achieve the better, stronger, and smarter version of one’s self. No one should ever be allowed to make us want to feel terrible for wanting to start all over again.

Dreams and Ambition of a 30-Year Old

Humans are natural dreamers when it comes to our view of what tomorrow has in stock for us. While almost everyone can dream, only a few see a clear path and direction to make it happen.

The general belief is that, at 30, you’ve graduated from college, got a plum job, and you have an apartment to call your own – either rented or owned. But what if you lack all of these? 

Most times, one’s status at their 30th birthday is sometimes met with a lot of pride or deep reflection about the dreams that are yet to be realized.

On my 30th birthday, I woke up in my 2-bedroom flat with lots of joy and gladness running through my heart and rumbles in my tummy.

But, the immediate birthday before it, my 29th, was met with lots of concerns about being jobless, not seeing a clear assurance of being able to offset essential bills, and then contemplation about a tomorrow that I could not determine and predict.

I went into deep reflections and prayed while my brain was loaded with all of those things I wanted to achieve before clocking 30 the following year.

To make matters worse, I had a network of friends whom the majority had their cars, decent accommodation; some were married with kids and had attained managerial levels at the workplace.

Instead of getting unnecessarily worried and pressured about my financial and career gaps, I was more curious about what the next decade would look like and how it will kick-start. Still, I was concerned if there was anything I wasn’t doing right.

Seven months to my 30th birthday, the bright side of nature began to unfold on me.

Right now, I’ve got a clear career path, added quality friends to my network, and have never felt much sufficient and better about the coming future for me. Things are beginning to align much faster, and it seems like the age was heralding a new era.

Develop it at 30 or Regret it?

Starting over at 30 may be draining and very challenging but can be done sustainably.

Knowing that it’s never too late to reboot or overcome any challenge – whether you’re in your 30s, 40s and 50s seems to be the greatest motivation that needs to be thought in the four walls of the classroom these days. Let me guess; you just had a thought on your status at 30? Sure, you did. 

While that may have made you happy or concerned, age keeps ticking. However, if our conditions change positively at post-30 age, the conviction, willingness, and resolve to change the status quo must first come from within.

At 30, we can be overwhelmed and unsure about what we want to do. What may not be allowed is embracing ignorance, unwillingness to acquire formal education, inability to identify a skill that can be commercialized or the struggle to part ways with the comfort zone.

If one gets trapped in their inability to conquer their fears at 30, it is highly likely to stay with them for a more extended time, lower their self-esteem, and inability to take chances. 

Utilize the freedom: Socially, age thirty usually comes with a lot of freedom and a thirst for adventure. It’s a lot of advantages that can be maximized to impact one’s life positively. While there’s no one seeking your moral and behavioral uprightness, the onus is on you to use it to attract a network that creates endless opportunities. 

Confidence: is a critical feature that must come in handy or be developed if one must be ready to navigate the journey ahead of the ’30s. One will also need to be intentional about networking with those who matter, even above your status.

Inner circle: the people you spend most of our time with are so influential on our actions and thought process that they can pollute or nourish it. By all means, avoid relationships that will kill growth. At age 30, we only need people that can empower and supercharge us to be equipped for the phases of life.

Learning Curve: Knowledge, they say, is power, and learning every day is the key to staying alive, but it’s even more potent if it’s acquired as a continuous process. While you acquire enough of it, one must endeavor to empower others to stay with us for as long as possible.

Boundaries: knowing when to draw a line to personal and professional relationships. I have learned over the years that setting boundaries helps to stabilize my emotional wellbeing and integrity. While I ensure to set boundaries, I make sure they are tailored to my kind of people, circumstances, and relationships. It would help if you also consider this.

Rest: Being tired is not a sign of weakness. It’s a constant state of human life. The energy dispelled at 30 upwards will require you to combat stress. Resting is self-love and is an essential activity for mental and physical recovery. Without having enough rest, we can’t deploy enough energy to tasks that help us achieve our set goals in life.

Waking up to Yourself and the Future

Our local and global environments are fast evolving and developing. Interestingly, the rapid evolution is accompanied by lots of benefits and opportunities.

While age and other social characteristics such as education may help impact and shape our lives, we must be conscious enough to stop living in the past and start living in the future.

The future they say is now, which makes it essential to eliminate the potential limitations to propel us to the future by giving it a plan we want to walk through.

This is more sustainable and achievable if we plan our progression by creating a plan to achieve the change we want to experience. Set mid-to-long-term goals and break them down into smaller short-term goals that are doable over a set time.

Our future starts and continues when we wake up every morning to make our mark in first, our own lives and then an aspect of life or the other.

Our minds and brain are fond of been programmed based on past experiences, events, and observations, but we have the power to change that and reprogram our thoughts, redirect our steps, and ultimately our lives.

Bottom Line

When deciding to start over, we should not lack confidence in our minds, even at higher age milestones such as 40 and 50.

Trust me; it’s far better to start over late than experiencing the regret of not trying at all at an older age because that era of having to appreciate or regret your youthful events will come hunting you sooner.

Starting over requires different resources – human, educational, emotional, financial, and physical resources. While they are not exhaustive, each is unique to supercharge us to achieve our core aspirations. 

Human – guide and fresh perspectives of experienced advisors

Educational – basic knowledge to create and eliminate failure

Emotional – the wisdom to navigate unwritten rules

Financial – because essential things are mostly not available for free

Physical – the private place for quality rest, protection, and deep thinking

In the end, we need as many resources as the amount of air we breathe in because they help us not just survive but attain the success and fondest dreams we long to realize.

If you ever get tired of being held down by your limitations and inactions, it’s time to depart from them, rejig your psyche and start living the rest of your days as the best of it. 

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